Leaders, Take a Look at Yourselves
Strong leadership starts with a simple, uncomfortable habit: looking in the mirror. Not to admire what’s working, but to confront where it isn’t. The best leaders aren’t the ones with all the answers; they’re the ones who keep asking better questions of themselves.
Intention vs. Impact
Most damaging leadership behaviour is well-intended. You jump in to “help,” you tighten oversight to “protect standards,” you centralise decisions to “move faster.” The intention is noble. The impact can be corrosive:
People stop taking initiative because you always step in.
Motivation drops when work becomes checklists to please you.
Teams go quiet; they learn feedback is unwelcome or pointless.
If your team is cautious, compliant, and waiting on you, you don’t have a people problem. You have an impact problem.
The Insecurity Trap
Left unchecked, leadership insecurity mutates into poor habits:
Owning everything. Hoarding decisions because “it’s quicker if I do it.”
Micromanaging. Monitoring activity over outcomes; confusing presence with progress.
Feedback avoidance. Deflecting, explaining, or punishing dissent.
Hero mode. Firefighting to feel valuable, starving others of growth.
Narrative control. Rewriting misses to protect ego, which kills learning.
These patterns are costly. They slow execution, hide risk, and drive your best people away. Worst of all, they make you blind to your own development needs: “If the team just tried harder, we’d be fine.” That story feels safe, and keeps you stuck.
A 15-Minute Self-Audit
Block a quarter hour. Be specific and brutally honest.
Motivation & Clarity
Can every person explain why their work matters in one sentence?
Do I praise specific behaviors weekly that I want repeated?
Autonomy & Trust
Where am I involved today that my team could own within 30 days?
What decisions still require me that shouldn’t, and why?
Feedback & Safety
When did someone last change my mind? What made that possible?
How do I respond when I’m stressed: curious… or controlling?
Standards & Outcomes
Do we measure outcomes or obsess over hours and updates?
Which metrics would keep improving if I took two weeks off?
If these questions sting, good. That’s the signal you’re leading again.
Lead the Change You Want to See
Make work winnable. Translate strategy into three clear outcomes. Say what great looks like, and what “good enough” looks like.
Give real ownership. Set the guardrails, agree the decision rights, and step back. Review results, not methods. If it’s not working, don’t blame the team, something else might be amiss.
Normalize dissent. Ask “What are we missing?” first in meetings. Publicly thank the person who disagrees and use at least one suggestion. Never look like you’re holding a grudge.
Swap status for enablement. Replace update meetings with a dashboard; use the time to remove blockers and grow capability.
Recognise precisely. “Your customer brief cut rework by 30%, that’s the standard.” People repeat what’s noticed.
Get Help. That’s Strength, Not Weakness
Elite performers have coaches because the closer you are to the work, the harder it is to see yourself. Coaching gives you:
A mirror for intention vs. impact
A sandbox to practice hard conversations
Accountability for the habits you keep postponing
Needing help isn’t insecurity; pretending you don’t is.
What You Risk by Standing Still
Silent resignation. People do the minimum and keep their best ideas to themselves.
Fragile execution. Everything depends on you; velocity collapses when you step away.
Talent drain. High performers don’t wait for permission to grow elsewhere.
Reputation damage. Teams remember how you lead when it’s hard; word travels.
A One-Week Reset
Day 1: Ask your team, “What’s one thing I do that slows you down?” Say thank you. Change one behavior within 48 hours.
Day 3: Shift a decision you own to your team. Define success and the guardrails. Live with their approach.
Day 5: Run a short session: “Start / Stop / Continue.” Commit publicly to two changes and book a check-in in 30 days.
Leadership isn’t a title; it’s a practice. When you face your blind spots, motivation rises, ownership spreads, and performance compounds. Look in the mirror, then act on what you see.